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June 24, 2007
Starting the Twenty Ninth Day of June in the Year Two Thousand and Seven, I will cease to be friends with or engage in more than casual and shallow conversation ((This includes the comments on this blog. Starting Friday they will require that you prove you own an Apple iPhone. Everyone else can suck it.)) with anyone who does not own the new Apple iPhone.
Why?
Because I’m a fanboy. Because I’m caught up in the moment. Because I’m illogical. Because I’m dumb enough to pay $600 for a cellphone. Because I’m an early adopter. Because it’s cool. Because I’m shallow. Because I’m sad inside. Because deep down I know Windows is better and I’m in denial. Because I wear all black and sit at Starbucks and sip on lattes while surfing the web. Because I like pretty things that scratch easily. Because I want my enterprise email to break. Because I’m hip. Because I hate Cingular and their network is slow and their coverage awful and, well, Sprint is better. Because real men write apps in Cocoa. Because the iPod was a failure and I want in on that. Because I want the screen to smear with fingerprints so I can’t read it. Because [insert phrase from John C. Dvorak column here]. Because I’m a Mac user and we’re the only ones that will ever buy this phone (just like the iPod). Because I don’t have anything better to do with my money (other than roll around in it and giggle). Because Steve told me to do it. Because I’d buy anything Apple makes.
BECAUSE STEVE JOBS IS MY PERSONAL LORD AND SAVIOUR.
That’s why.
I’m with you ... June 29th ... though my reason is “Because Steve told me to do it.”
Why do I live in Europe? :(
Will you be accepting comments after 29 June from people who can prove that they’re planning to get an iPhone but don’t have one due to them being all snapped up, or are you rolling hardcore?
And what of us convicts ensconced downunder who wont be graced by such glorious superfluousness until 2008?
Eric: I’m rolling hardcore. Of course, if for some reason I am unable to get one, I will continue to allow comments from anyone.
Steve: You have been whitelisted forever plus 2 days. ;)
What if I’m just holding out until the iPhone Cingular contract ends and T-Mobile is able to pick it up (only other U.S. quad-band provider) because I hate Cingular more than I want to drop ~1000 bucks for a new phone and breaking of contract?
I’ll also eliminate your bagel debt to me.
Sorry, Brian. Argument denied. You will be shunned.
nooooooooooo!!
I’m with you, although I’ve just about had it with the iPhone hype.
Sure, I want one as bad as the next Apple fan boy. I’ve sat and watched the 22 minute guide. Twice. I’m planning my Friday around waiting at the Apple Store, but in order to allow myself not to be devastated I’m expecting not getting it on Friday. It’s keeping me from being too heartbroken.
Crying in public because the iPhones all sold out before you could get one and recording it will get you a lifetime membership to this site. iPhone or no iPhone. ;)
But I’m with you Tom. I’ll be happy to get one and I’m expecting shortages.
You know, I happen to live in the U.S. but in one of the rare states that, while part of even the Lower 48 has somehow managed not having Cingular/AT&T service. It’s a place called Montana, and it’s only slightly different from Australia in that, well, people here are fat. Oh, and we use looneys for money. Can I be whitelisted as well? Or maybe pink-sheeted? Shot in the head? Ugh, this is the true State of Denial.
I will be shunning a more broad group of those people who do not have the iPhone and Nintendo Wii - I mean c’mon guys, if you are not part of the technology zeitgeist then you get the index-finger-to-the-thumb shun!
What could we possibly have in common if you guys are pussy-footing around with my zeitgeist!
Even though I have no friends, I work from home and rarely leave it and really would like an iPhone without the phone part and an 80GB hard drive - I need to suck it up and so do you…
*Disclaimer: I own shares of Apple stock.
Jim: LOL.
Why would you even want to talk to anybody else while engaging with your Precious.
My Precious...PRECIOUS!
I had to comment, just because of your post to flickr about this post. Funny. I supposed you saw PC World’s attempt to scratch or otherwise damage an iPhone. Heresy. But recorded for all to see here:
http://www.pcworld.com/video/id,545-page,1-bid,0/video.html